Lost, Scotland

A friend on Facebook recently posted she was holidaying in Scotland. Great, I thought, it's a beautiful country with many lovely people... but it appears all those lovely people might be a bit squished up.

I'm sure some of the eagle-eyed among you will have already noticed the problem in the header image. according to the map attached to the check-in for Scotland on Facebook the entire country is located in the middle of London.

Seeing that I could find directions, I asked the connected mapping service (Here, a Nokia company apparently and owner of some of the least readable text on the internet) how to get from Glasgow to Scotland, just in case any Glaswegians might be feeling homesick for the glens, lochs and isles.

So, never fear people of Glasgow (other Scottish cities are available) all you need to do to visit Scotland is drive a fairly straight 415.8 miles (it'll take just over 7 hours).

Now, obviously I won't share the entire list of directions with you but it did end with possibly the most magnificent final entry I've ever read.

Yep, if you want to find Scotland, just go to the Elephant and Castle, and turn left. Maybe book in advance though, it's probably crowded.

Video Games and Violence - The Faulty Connection

As gamers we're used to the idea of things respawning, enemies, weapons, ammo... good and bad they come around again and again.

As sure as death and taxes, every now and again a report will roll around that connects video games and violence, pointing out how anyone who picks up a joystick or mouse are ticking timebombs, ready to pop off and go postal at the merest opportunity.

Instead of simply pointing out this is stupid, prejudiced and illogical, I thought I'd suggest something slightly different instead.

Yes, violent people play violent video games. People might play video games and go on to do violent things. But they're not a cause, and it's ridiculous to suggest it is.

I have played video games since I was 3 years old on a rubber keyed Spectrum 48k and that has included a lot of violence (although I've played almost every kind of game around).

I've died in a million ways and killed millions, maybe even billions of characters in just as many. Just in the last week I've shot, stabbed, blown up, beaten and defenestrated more people than I can count and less than 24 hours ago I blew someone's head off with a sawn off double barrelled shotgun from close range... in slow motion.

That's not even counting the rest of my video gaming life, where I've jumped on people to squash them, run them over, cut their heads off and even, on two separate occasions, electrocuted urinating men via their penis (thank you for that one, Hitman Absolution)...

With a controller or a mouse in my hand I have been on a decades long crusade to rain death, destruction and pain on collections of pixels, polygons and textures that come under the heading of video game characters.

Now balance that against my real life where I have, in those same decades, had a grand total of one fight.

One.

I've had dustups, I've been bullied and hurt, I've had my share of threats. In all that time I have had one single fists flying, both sides giving it their best, honest to goodness fight and that was when I was 8 years old.

So what's the magic formula, why have I killed so many people in video games but would hesitate to even throw a punch in reality? Because it's reality and I understand that.

Video games are fiction, those people on the screen can be killed because they're not real people. I have a solid and concrete understanding of the difference between fantasy and reality, and it's never wavered, even after playing a LOT of video games a LOT of the time.

Video games are a story, a fiction and I'm just a player in that. To suggest I'll become a murderer because I play video games you might as well suggest Alan Rickman will become homicidal because he played Hans Gruber or Snape.

I personally know gamers young and old, and every one is the same way, what happens on the screen is fiction and once the console or PC goes off, that's life. I've even seen a young kid grow up from early teens into a young man, in that time he's played violent video games (among others), and there's not a chance in Hell he'd hurt someone.

The first time I met him he was playing a first person action (I think Fallout 3) and then over the years came Call of Duty, Hitman, Assassins Creed, GTA, all the usual suspects. Through all that he's stayed kind-hearted, caring and entirely unlikely to pick up a gun and go on a shooting spree. Because he's sensible and plays video games for fun, for entertainment.

So here we reach the misplaced point in the various reports about video games and violence. They're not a cause, they're at worst a trigger for people who already have a problem, and at 'best' a symptom.

Speak to any gamer and I can almost guarantee that they'll have a story about "that guy" or "that girl". It could be on a forum, at a convention or online in a multiplayer game but you will come across people who give you... well, the creeps.

Someone who takes things too seriously, someone sounds like they're enjoying things a little too much in a deathmatch or someone who simply says or does something that makes you want to back away slowly.

They exist, and to say otherwise is being almost as silly as the people who love to suggest we're all Hannibal Lecter in a headset.

This is because gamers, as a group, are not immune to the simple and inarguable fact that plagues every set of people in the world. Bad people exist.

Religion has them, politics has them, business has them and so do video games. none of those things are a cause though. If the potential criminals were suddenly bereft of them they'd find their outlet elsewhere, violent TV, movies, books, magazines or sport. 

I'm of an age that means I remember the case of James Bulger here in the UK. For those who don't know the case he was an almost-three-year-old who was abducted, tortured and murdered by two 10 year olds.

At the time there was a lot of press about violent movies being behind the act, especially 'Child's Play 3". It turned out that there was no way for the police to know the killer had watched it but it didn't stop the connection being made as people desperately tried to work out why it had happened, tried to find something to blame for why two children had killed another.

The problem is this deflects from the real issues at hand. There are people out there with mental illness and they need help or at least control. By knee jerking a response accusing whatever's close to hand to try and find a reason for their violence is just trying to take an easy way out.

It absolves science institutions from researching mental illness, it stops governments from feeling guilty over mistreatment or lack of care for people who have a problem, it sweeps the story away from gun control, parenting, schooling or religion and solely into the laps of those who create entertainment.

Violent people exist and some play video games. but they also drive a Prius, or eat marmalade, or wear odd socks. Violent people do everything...but normal people do too, and there's a LOT more of the latter.

24 Hours with Windows 10 - Part II

As anyone who follows my social media will know, yesterday I took the plunge and installed Windows 10. I did this because I'm a geek, I love new shiny things and also because many of my family and friends have been watching me like a scientist watches a lab rat he's just injected with something green and glowing.

I am, if you'll excuse my mixed rodent metaphors, a guinea pig, so with that in mind and with numerous questions ringing in my ears from all around I'm going to give my early impressions of Windows 10, answer some questions and give some opinions.

I'm doing this in two parts, the first wass simple facts about the actual updating and rolling back and can be read HERE. This, Part 2, covers my general impressions of Windows 10.

OK, on to the specifics and my experiences.

I guess I'd better start with some full disclosure stuff. I'm a geek, I have OCD and I like to have some control, so this will be tinged with that, I'll try to keep it in balance.

Pros

I'm going to get the positives out of the way first, because there's a lot of them and in the other section of this post I'm going to be less than complimentary.

From the minute I loaded it Windows 10 felt different but familiar. It took next to no time to feel natural in Windows 10 and find myself zipping around in it like I'd been using it for months.

If you're upgrading from 8 you might need to re-remember a few things but if you're coming from 7 it won't be long before it's second nature.

The simple fact is as an operating system, for day-in day-out use Windows 10 isn't just good, it's great. It's fast (booting and shutting down times are measure in seconds), it's smooth and what it needs to do, it does well.

Possibly the most surprising feature for me has been how they've taken the worst part of Windows 8, the tiles, and actually turned it into a well designed and useful aspect of Windows 10.

It's all part of the new Start Menu which is different from 7, but not enough to be bad.

The left hand side of the new Start Menu is no longer pinned stuff but most used apps and a list of the sort of thing that used to be on the right, documents, pictures etc.

Then the pinned stuff that used to be on the left are now in the new minimised Windows 8 tiles type section on the right.

As you can see I've done a fairly basic set of shortcuts right now but am actually interested to see what kind of active tiles and options I might have for over there. In Windows 8, as the dominant method of picking and opening apps it felt terrible, but now working as a compliment to a more traditional style of start menu I feel like this is what it should have been from day 1. It's useable as a basic option for people who want tradition or a flashy option for people who want more, but without compromising either.

The new menu stylings tend to be intuitive, the new strip options at the top of all windows (you'll know the style if you use Office) actually make it easier to do the more common tasks, and new options appear and disappear as you do it so to me it never felt cluttered.

Standard navigating around your computer's files is almost identical to before just with a few bits of visual tweaking.

Even some aspects that feel like they were designed more with mobile devices in mind like the new Action Centre/Notifications are works for this and doesn't feel overbearing or out of place. Sadly that can't be said for all the aspects, as you'll see later.

So that, by far and away is what I can say is the good side of Windows. As an operating system, it works very, very well which I guess is the most important thing. What it's meant to do and what most folks will want it to do, those are where it shines and I can see why so many people were going gaga over it.

Lots of what's changed feels like it's not change for changes sake but really makes the whole experience better, easier, more intuitive... If the negatives I'm about to get to weren't there I would probably class 10 as a better operating system than even Windows 7 and simply move on, delighted I'd be using it and totally sure it was the best for me.

But that's a big if, so with no further ado...

Cons

We can't really skip over this much longer, there is, especially for an OCD geek like me, a MASSIVE problem with Windows 10. It feels... locked.

I guess it's understandable as we're getting what amounts to a free trial, but it has to be said that in general Windows 10 feels constrictive.

Unlike previous versions where we had fairly hefty control over the programs and features in it, Windows 10 comes full of what they call apps, but many people will call bloatware.

There's an app for photos, an app for music, an app for videos... and they're all stuck there unless you do some sneaky jiggery pokery with some command line fiddling behind the scenes (only be careful as I borked the PC once doing one).

There's also some of Microsoft's own software they've connected into Windows 10 in a fairly concrete manner, OneNote, OneDrive and Edge (the fancy new name for Internet Explorer).

They might be useful and many folks may use them, but I won't, and in principle wanted them gone, especially OneDrive which spreads itself into your PC with folders here and there, shortcuts all over the place and the potential for it to automatically go off and find stuff to stick in the cloud.

Oh, and if you're wondering about Edge... It's Internet Explorer. It just is. They've changed the name to avoid the toxic branding that's always been their browser shackle but sadly, it is what it is.

As I mentioned before, it is possible to get rid of them via the geeky route, but on at least one occasion they returned, and as they're not "officially" removed, just disabled, then they'll always potentially be there, waiting to get themselves back in when I get one of the updates from Windows that are now forced on anyone getting the free Home version of Windows 10.

Gone are the days of checking for updates and choosing whether to install or not, even gone are the days you could skip an update that you didn't want or was broken, now you get it all, all the time. This can lead to some situations where stuff you've cleared comes back and stuff that broken keeps breaking your PC however many times you do a system restore.

It's not a deal breaker but it frustrates me, I feel like I should have control over my own PC and whether I want things of little consequence on it.

I'm most annoyed by the amount of apps that are for mobile devices, phones and tablets. The problem is Windows has been designed as a universal OS for a multitude of devices and what you might gain on a tablet or mobile simply feels like useless faff on a PC.

There's a camera app, a contacts app, a maps app, and an entire app store full of stuff that's there for a mobile phone and has no place on a PC.

Why have a Netflix app when it's not as good as the Netflix website, obtainable from Chrome just a click away? It's also full of potentially iffy stuff, when I loked at Netflix the TOP two suggested apps were pirate streaming apps for Homeland and Blacklist... not something I imagine would endear this store to anyone in the film or tv industry.

In online shopping terms the Play store for Google and the App Store on iDevices are the big flash department stores, they're Harrods, Macy's or Fortnum and Masons.

The Amazon Store is catching up but it's still liek your base brand high street store or supermarket, it's Tesco's or WalMart.

The Microsoft Store feels like a Poundstore/Dollar Store

All in all when you dig deeper you find beneath a good operating system is an underlying bed of almost un-removeable apps that make it feel like it's been designed to be a jack of all trades and as such master of none. It might leave you feeling fulfilled on a tablet or mobile because you'll feel like it's what you're used to but better, but on a PC they feel a bit like a step back.

The same can be said about the new Search function, they now try to squeeze in Bing web search results, although that option can, thankfully, be turned off. It's also, in America, the base for Cortana, and might be soon in the UK too, a digital assistant I have no desire to use and no interest in.

That seems to limit the search's ability to, well, search. I tried a few times to find files I knew were there with no luck. It might be an option I need to fiddle but still.... not a great start and another way I feel like they've ignored the Search function because it's meant to be Cortana, with little hope for anyone who doesn't want to use it.

So that leaves me an almost wholly undecided conclusion. Speaking of which...

Conclusion

I am still, 24 hours in, feeling somewhat split about Windows 10. No, UTTERLY split.

I still feel that if you have Windows 8 and want something more traditional, then you should go for Windows 10 and you'll love it.

The Start menu is back in a way I personally think trumps the old one. The tiles have gone in hiding (though still findable via "tablet mode" and it's fast and smooth.

The problem is if you're updating from Windows 7 and can't let go of some control. This is where I'm struggling, it really can annoy you but in the smallest of ways, like a paper cut. Having an app I don't want in my list, even if it's not used, just vexes me.

Unlike an 8 updater who's getting something much better than the mess they already have, updating from Windows 7 is a strange feeling.

On the one hand it's shinier, some stuff is different but good different, I've already found myself using the new design of start menu and other aspects of 10 like I've been using them all my life.

On the other hand any update from 7 feels like a trade... you get the shiny, but you're distanced from your own computer, what might have felt personal and controllable, suddenly feels restrictive and closed minded.

I'm torn because I truly like Windows 10, I like the mixture of new and old, I like the fact it won't become obsolete with it's incremental updates, I like what it does and mostly how it does it and I feel like the more I use it, the more I learn on it, I'll find ways in which it's even better.

But can I stop myself from demanding control over my own computer destiny? If the apps I've removed suddenly return when I unblock the Store from my firewall, will it feel like an ulcer that just won't go away, an unwelcome houseguest who's taking over my living room and making me buy new furniture?

So that's my dilemma. Can I take an OS that tries to tell me what I have to have, however great it works day in, day out?

Right now, yes. As it stands I'm going to stick with 10. It's good enough that it deserves a chance to impress and a chance to make me forget it's faults and work at it.

But what's going to happen in 29 days time, when my ability to roll back goes away? I'll tell you in 29 days.

24 Hours with Windows 10 - Part I

As anyone who follows my social media will know, yesterday I took the plunge and installed Windows 10. I did this because I'm a geek, I love new shiny things and also because many of my family and friends have been watching me like a scientist watches a lab rat he's just injected with something green and glowing.

I am, if you'll excuse my mixed rodent metaphors, a guinea pig, so with that in mind and with numerous questions ringing in my ears from all around I'm going to give my early impressions of Windows 10, answer some questions and give some opinions.

I'm doing this in two parts, the first is simple facts about the actual updating and rolling back. Part 2 is HERE and covers my general impressions of Windows 10.

TL;DR

OK, the quick first impressions for anyone who doesn't want to read too much of my waffle.

If you're using Windows 8, hate it and gaze with jealousy on anyone who has an older OS, you'll fall upon Windows 10 like a long lost pet Targ, clutch it warmly to your bosom and weep tears of joy.

If you're using Windows 7, don't want to fiddle and want something shiny and new, you'll probably like it.

If you're techy and like to fiddle and have control over what's on your PC, there will be a hefty debate.

Updating

So, twas a misty morn as the ravens flew overhead and I starting installing Windows 10. To give credit to the developers I've rarely, if ever to be honest, had an OS install go this smoothly.

I feel I'm uniquely qualified to judge the merits of the install as I ended up installing Windows 10 not once, but three times yesterday. All on the same computer and largely down to my own stupidity... so with that admitted, lets get on.

You simply download a 3gb or so set of files through Windows Update, click a few buttons and away you go. It's fast, it's smooth, there's minimal moments of blank screen put in just to terrify you that it's crashed and all is lost... everything it should be.

It then got to the stage of the install where it's setting up Windows for you... and it's here the installer and I had our first little disagreement.

You get a page called "Get going fast!" which promises you some lovely express settings which will enrich your life with a big button that says "click me, I'm lovely, we're impatient!"

Don't. Let me just emphasise that in ever way I can.

** Don't click "Use Express Settings". **

Instead, find the tiny text, coloured to blend in with the background that says to customise your install and click that instead.

You'll soon find what you've just avoided is a range of privacy and app options that sway from the sensible ones like telling MS when you have a crash so they can bug report it to the downright bizarre.

My "favourite" of the latter would be the one asking to help your "typing, inking and handwriting" by having full access to all your contacts and calendar... Um, no.

Personally I removed everything other than reporting crashes to Microsoft. Also be aware if you've installed 10 already, you can change these in Privacy.

There's then a quick section where they try to make the new Metro apps for photos, music, videos and the internet take over (four more nos). While some of this may work ok the harshest of these is when it tries to overwrite your internet settings and defaults to using Edge, otherwise known as Internet Explorer 12.

No, no, no and most definitely NO.

Then, finally you get to actually launch Windows.

This seems a good moment to have a question...

Q: I'm not sure I want to update, I have important battle plans on here, my rare collection of Cantina Music for Lovers and a desktop wallpaper of Alderaan which is obviously special to me.
- Concerned Princess

A: Princess, we all understand. There's nobody who's not concerned when updating about losing those pictures of their husband with his hairy wookie out. Barring any unlikely critical accidents everything you have will come across.

I was actually pleasantly surprised with how much stuff carried over, it had my desktop image, almost all my software (only my Firewall was incompatible), all my favourites, settings and even default apps were there, it felt seamless.

Going Back

Of course, after going through all this, you might find you hate Windows 10 (Especially if you're on 7) and want to go back, so lets quickly cover that.

You might be surprised to learn that as hard as Microsoft are pushing Windows 10, they've actually made it really easy to go back (something I ended up doing twice, because I'm an idiot).

When you installed Windows 10 it adds a folder called Windows.old, which is your old version. To get it back just go to Settings, Update and then the Backup tab to see this option...

Just click to go back and after some quick techy fiddling your old OS will be back, just as you left it. You'll have everything there from the moment you updated, so no new software or settings will carry over.

One quick important note on this though... you only have THIRTY days after installing Windows 10 to roll back, after that period the only way you'll get a previous OS again is if you have a copy of it and do a totally clean install on your PC which is tedious at best. (Creating a clone of your old OS or a disk image is a possibility but not one I'll go into here.)

Privacy

Before I leave, just a quick note of something you may well want to do quickly when first using 10. Go to settings and go to the Privacy section for a LOT of options.

While I can't tell you what to accept and what not to accept, I just turned everything off, AND I didn't sign into Windows 10 with my Microsoft account, which keeps my computer activity much more secure.

Again, privacy is very much your own concern and choice, some may feel less pressured by it or accept more than I do and that's not wrong in any way, it all comes down to opinion.

My Idiocy

To finish off, I thought I'd point out just why I ended up installing, rolling back, installing, rolling back and finally installing again.

The first time was a known issue clash between NVIDIA drivers for my graphics. the official NVIDIA driver updater thinks the pre-Windows 10 version is newer than the Windows 10 compatible one, so tries to overwrite it, that can then cause the system to break giving you a black screen with just a mouse pointer.

There's already a patch in though, so if you have an NVIDIA card you have a few options.

My personal suggestion would be to disable the NVIDIA driver updater and just let Windows handle it. You can do that (if you're of a tech bent) by using msconfig and stopping the service. If you're not techy, just remember to search for Windows Updates BEFORE rebooting your PC after doing the install.

The second time I had to roll back and re-install was because I tried to be too clever by half in removing some of the apps that MS forces on you, and I ended up removing too much and having to repair the problem with an install...

There's more on that however in Part 2 of this, so if you're interested in my quick knee-jerk review and thoughts of the operating system you can read those HERE.

Backwards Compatibility, the Developer Dilemma

It seems strange when so many new games, new techs and new ideas have been launched at E3 that the thing that has caught the eye the most for me surrounds games already gone, but one of the most telling contributions this event season seems to have arrived in seven simple words from Microsoft.

"Play Xbox 360 games on Xbox One." Backwards compatibility, the holy grail of gamers.

Of course, it's not totally open. It's "select 360 games" and uses a digital download of the same kin as Sony's classics range. It is, however, free and a very good start.

However, it might not be such good news for developers and it's not just because free games means a partial end to the eternal screw-job of making us pay for a new version of games we already have.

The desire for backwards compatibility, combined with the huge hootenanny created by the trailer for the Final Fantasy VII remake, inevitably leads to the question of why people want to play older games instead of new ones, and to answer that question I am going to say something a little shocking...

On average I don't believe games are as good these days.

Don't be fooled into thinking I'm sitting here in rose tinted specs harking back to the days of 8-bit graphics, electronic blingy music and clashing primary colours. There are a number of games I am anxious to play, Arkham Knight and Hitman being top of the list.

However, the amount of games I see as a definite purchase is much lower than in previous years because game for game, I believe the quality of gaming has dropped in inverse proportion to the quality of tech.

More and more recently things seemed to be tipped in favour of what the tech can give us, about high res textures, lighting effects, motion capture, audio... and less about what really makes a game a game, the play features, the characters, the story and immersiveness.

I recently read an article that suggested developers shouldn't be spending time on backwards compatibility and instead should be looking at why they're failing to make the most of new tech. To me that's an entirely backwards way of looking at it.

People aren't returning to older games because they make better use of engines, lighting effects or textures, they're playing them because they make the most of things that tech CAN'T give us, storyline, characters, immersiveness and gameplay.

Too often these days developers seem to care more about style than substance, we hear all about how this engine will give us realistic sunsets or that the characters have the most lifelike movements, but we rarely hear about what actually makes a game good.

When is the last time we got a really iconic and memorable character? Over the years I've seen so many of them, Ryu, Mario, Sonic, Agent 47, Link, Samus, Lara Croft, Scorpion... but recently all the major new personalities either haven't stuck or simply never existed, with the possible exception of those from The Last of Us.

These days characters don't get built to last, they get rehashed from old games, taken from popular culture or are simply dislikeable or uninteresting (Connor in AC3 and Pearce in Watch_Dogs being examples of that).

Equally, worlds rarely drag you in and keep you interested. Some like Bioware and Bethesda still manage it and suck you into a storyline and a world, but that's still a rare occurrence. Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Fallout, Skyrim, all brilliant but all the exception, not the norm.

It's that failure developers need to fight against, instead of worrying about something being shiny and new, perhaps making the game fun and interesting might be the priority. The question is not "how can we better use the tech?" it's "how can we better use our brains?"

If they ask themselves the latter and start to bring us games with next gen tech but old-gen gameplay, perhaps we might finally enter a second golden age of gaming instead of what is increasingly feeling like a dark age.

Watch_Dogs; The Danger of Hype?

[Please note, spoilers ahead. Paragraphs bordered in red include major plot points.]

When it comes to games I can't seem to stop thinking about, Watch_Dogs is high on the list for a number of reasons, not least the rather large box in my gaming area as I bought the Dedsec edition. What I didn't expect however was that it would only keep returning in my mind, and not in my PS3.

With Watch_Dogs 2 now being talked about and it's Creative Director talking about all the changes that they're looking to make, I decided to try and put all my thoughts about the original into some kind of cohesion... and invite everyone else along for the ride.

Let me just state early and for the record, I like Watch_Dogs and I hate that I don't love it... but its major downfall for me has been the amount of hype it generated and the promises it seemed to make that weren't fulfilled. It's become my go-to example now in debates about not letting hype become too big too soon.

From the start of the pomotions Watch_Dogs looked different, for me it even gave the idea that the protagonist might be more of a man like me... admittedly a more attractive, athletic, intelligent, skilled, charismatic etc version of me, but me nonetheless.

"...it even gave the idea that the protagonist might be more of a man like me..."

Aiden Pearce was going to be an uber-geek, using brains rather than brawn, using technology to his advantage and setting up elaborate schemes rather than running in all guns blazing. He was going to explore a world he had control over and explore side plots and stories that appeared from being able to find out about the lives of everyone in it.

Problem is... that was wider off the mark than a Stormtrooper shot.

Instead of a powerful cyber-warrior coding and hacking and using, well... Geek skills, Pearce seems to do the bare minimum technically, even arguably as much as anyone could do in his place. The only time he came up against a second hacker he was outclassed in every way, having things done to him he was incapable of doing back... the game itself shouting "you're not very good at this".

When things need doing on computers he invariably gets someone else to do them. Even his hacking powers around the city (more on that next) seem to be limited to pressing buttons on his magic phone that he was given by someone else.

Here, take this phone I made, it'll make you look clever.

While the PCs in his hideouts could have been used to put together new code (even as a mini game) and let him advance, instead all the tricks up his sleeve seem to be presented to him as already fully built apps onto a phone he had no hand in creating.

Pearce felt like an enforcer, even just hired muscle. At no point was I left feeling like I was controlling a hacker, which was the main selling point of the game for many.

Of course, that does bring me to the actual hacking itself... which could possibly be the most disappointing part of the game. If I can quote off the back of by DedSec box;

"As Aiden Pearce, you can hack into this entire city and make Chicago your ultimate weapon ... get instant control over the city and its citizens."

Even the game's main tagline "Hacking is our weapon" gave the impression this would be a hackers game, the skills you had would me huge and instrumental in the quest.

Except it wasn't, not really. There were times when you had to hack something to get the game to proceed, a building, a camera or a computer. But these felt incidental, hacking became a quest objective or a non-plot extra, but never really felt like the feature, that simply fell back to the old tried and tested angry man with a gun routine.

Even your "control" over the city was extremely limited. There was an excitement the first time you made some bollards rise or fall, a bit of a buzz when you first flicked some traffic lights or managed to time some garage doors opening and closing perfectly to let you through but block off your pursuers... but these moments were few and far between, short bursts between running and gunning.

Hacking, just a flashier version of shooting someone.

Other times the hacking were more frustrating than exciting, especially with the weird line of sight limitation, something I could understand from game balance reasons but just became a severe annoyance when the already limited hacking mechanics were rendered almost useless.

Take hacking chasing helicopters for example, a buyable skill that would stop those pesky flyboys chasing you for a short time. Sounds great and when you can use it it really could make the difference between escaping and getting busted... WHEN you can use it.

You see, with the line of sight limitation a helicopter has to be in Pearce's visual radius to work. You can, thanks to the radar, know exactly where the copter is but you can't do anything unless it's on your screen, and that's easier said than done.

Around 96.7% of the time when you put the game in slow-mo and go searching for the helicopter to disable it the tight and inflexible car view will mean getting eyes on it is impossible without stopping in the middle of a high speed chase, jumping out of the car and hoping to get back in before you're run over.

"In general the hacking felt like a tacked on gimmick instead of a deep seated game theme."

It was just an added annoyance to the line of sight limitation that was already making me ask... WHY? Was the phone only able to do IR connections that needs the receiver in sight? Is this 2005?

If that was the case why would it work to hack things you can see through a security camera?

It was one of those things that was put in obviously to balance the game, to make it a challenge and not make the hacking overpowered, but that's the problem. That was obviously why it was there, and things like that, which feel so grating in plot terms, are not enjoyable. Understandable yes but not enjoyable.

In general the hacking felt like a tacked on gimmick instead of a deep seated game theme. I recall one of the first things that came to light in previews was the idea of using the environment to help you complete missions, but most of the time it practice it was near useless.

Close a gate or raise bollards to try and stop a convoy and they'd just drive around it (running over pedestrians usually, although the police seemed fine with that...), try to plan an ambush and you'd find yourself adapting to your environment and not controlling it.

You couldn't funnel people to a specific location, you couldn't use traffic lights to make people go in a specific direction into a trap, the app for those just makes them go green in both directions. You never felt in control of the environment in these situations as much as just using what the developers had decided would be used on an inflexible route.

Of course, that's when side missions were actually about hacking in even a tiny way... apart from some collectibles the majority of quests followed open world standards, race between timed checkpoints, take out a specific person, pick up a car and drive it somewhere else while being chased... and almost always with zero need to hack a single thing, in fact sometimes it would make it harder if you did. It was formulaic in the extreme.

Hitting people with a stick, you'll do this more than hacking, but less than shooting.

Where were the hacking missions? Where was using the information collected by your all seeing Profiler app for blackmail or to coerce people into doing something? Where were cyber-heist missions? Embarrass useless politicians with released sexts, stop criminal activity by shutting down their online operations, hack the screens in the city to get OTHER people chased, in the same way people could do against you... the opportunities for cyber missions were endless, and yet it all collapsed back into standard open world fare.

Hacking might be the weapon of choice apparently... but if you wan't Pearce to succeed you really won't be using it all that much.

Of course, that's IF you want Pearce to succeed and brings me to perhaps the part of the game that is the most troublesome to me. Aiden Pearce is an exceptionally dislikeable man.

It must be said it's not all down to the poor guy himself, he is but a pawn in a rigid storyline that doesn't drive you along a plotline as much as hold your hand and drag you into certain actions and ways of doing things.

We're used to nuanced storylines these days, even ones that give us some modicum of control over the way things play out. Whether it's morality choices, gameplay choices or simply two ways of doing something for the fun of it, I'm getting more and more used to even non-traditional RPG games having elements of character creation.

"Aiden Pearce is an exceptionally dislikeable man."

There's very little of that in Watch_Dogs, and the problem is the man Pearce is fated to become is... well, he's not a very nice person at all and there's no way to stop that happening.

While the game has a morality system it's ineffective. It works similarly to InFamous, where actions would change how the city treats you, but in a purely cosmetic way for most ends. Even then, trying to make Pearce into a good man is grating and uncomfortable.

You find yourself going from taking down thieves on the street in non-lethal takedowns to full-on homicidal in the missions themselves with the freedom to take a lethal kill-them-all attitude and often making it impossible not to.

The most grating of all I found was one specific mission where you're tasked with rescuing Pearce's nephews from kidnappers. I was still, at this point, trying to play a good Pearce, thinking I could take a concentrated approach to revenge instead of killing anyone connected even generally.

I snuck in and spent a ridiculous amount of time taking everyone out as stealthily as I could. It took four, maybe five times longer at least than going in guns blazing and I took some bullets in return for my humanitarian approach, but it was how I felt Pearce SHOULD be, how I wanted to roleplay him.

I reached the video room my Nephew was in and I was actually quite proud, it was hard work but I felt it was worth it. Then the game gave me a clip round the ear and told me not to be so silly and try and change the plotline it had decided for me.

My nephew is hiding under the desk and the script goes "He saw me kill all those people..." So wait, what was all that for? why give me the option of non-lethal takedowns if not only will it not affect the storyline, you'll actually force the plotline and character of the main protagonist in a certain way?

Testing and a quick internet search reveals a few occasions where that is the same. At every turn the game takes you in the worst way, sneak in and quietly achieve a mission only to hear Pearce say "I made a lot of noise". Take another NPC down non-lethally and and your partner bemoans the fact you had to kill him.

It's not just the lack of choice and impact, but the fact you're given a false illusion that you have it only to be told your own choices simply don't matter. Why ask someone if they want tea or coffee when you only have hot chocolate?

The worst part is every choice, every decision, every plotline takes Pearce into being a more and more dislikeable character. Even when he's forced to think about his actions as bad he seems to feel about 30 seconds of doubt about his ways... right up to the next chance he has to whip a firearm out.

Shooting. You'll do this a lot, and it's nothing new.

Yes, this is a storyline based around revenge, but with revenge often comes redemption. Now and again we're teased with the idea we might be able to redeem Pearce and guide him on a better path, but he seems utterly uninterested, even if staying the way he is will cost him everything. The game is based so heavily around his motive of love for his family, and yet he won't change for them.

Even a late pivotal moment that could have been altered with a morality choice, the death of a close friend, is hardcoded. They die, for apparently no reason at all (I call this an emo-ending, negativity for the sake of it). He doesn't need more motivation, it doesn't expand the storyline, it creates nothing extra, all it seems to do is wipe out the idea he might use this friendship to NOT be... well, a stone-cold killer.

Amazingly there IS one single morality choice in the game. Sort Of. What I actually mean is AFTER the game there's a morality choice. Do you kill someone or let them live? It changes nothing, it's after the game has ended, there's no follow up, no future difference, no nothing, but suddenly we're given this half-assed attempt at saying who we want Pearce to be.

The stupid thing is that while every single other factor in the game told me that what Pearce would do is shoot the guy, I still chose to walk away. Because even when I knew my hopes and decisions meant squat, I still couldn't stop myself wanting him to do the right thing.

"In short it shouted "I'm different!" and then failed to back it up."

I could accept the other silliness and flaws in the game. Police gave up too easily, not following into railway stations and giving up if you were inside a garage area. The cars drove like they had no tread left on the tires. Enemy AI was sketchy at times... things that affect a lot of games.

The main problem is Watch_Dogs felt like it would be something different, and instead it felt like just another average open world game. It didn't have the character connection of GTA or Assassins Creed, the crazyness of Saints Row, the powers of Prototype or the choices of InFamous... In short it shouted "I'm different!" and then failed to back it up.

That. added to an easily dislikeable character led to a game I liked... but nowhere near as much as I'd hoped, which actually made it worse than one I didn't.

Despite all that, I not only want Watch_Dogs 2 to happen, I'm looking forward to it, I'm delighted that Ubisoft Montreal seem to understand a lot of what went wrong. Two of the games I just mentioned, Saints Row and Ubisoft's own Assassins Creed had rude beginnings.

Perhaps by avoiding the hype and approaching Watch_Dogs 2 with open eyes, I might even find myself so much happier than I ever was with the original.

---

Andy is always up for a geeky chat, but is hoping avoid having his bollards hacked by big fans of Watch_Dogs (He really does like it...) If that's the sort of thing you enjoy (the chatting not the assault) why not follow him on Twitter or Facebook? He promises not to use his magic phone to steal your money you if you do...

That All Important First Gaming Date

[WARNING: This post contains spoilers...]

Two things combined recently to make me think... The first of those was the incoming Commercially Approved Romance Day this Saturday and the second was, to me more exciting, PS-Plus new content day when I get my monthly influx of new games.

The convergence made me think... is there really a difference between a first date and buying a new game?

You're meeting someone for the first time, maybe you've seen pictures of them, heard recommendations from friends or family... and now you're taking the plunge yourself.

You've made some outlay in effort or money and now is the fateful moment when you work out if they will is going to be the one you spend all your time (and money) on... or is it time to give it an incorrect email, a barely believable promise to "load you again soon" and a quick trip into town to exchange them.

So, with that in mind I've decided to list off a few of my most memorable first gaming dates, the ones that have stuck with me for the right reasons... or, first, the wrong ones.

The Date That's All About Them - Yakuza 4

This was actually the one that really inspired this article... Having survived the first couple hours the game itself is passable but my God, it was touch and go whether I'd last to that point.

The problem with Yakuza 4 is it combines a few of my all time least favourite intro/tutorial "features" all into one frustrating mishmash.

It has the jarring fourth-wall breaking tutorial moments when a random person runs up to the main character in the street and explains something for apparently no reason at all "Hey, I've given you a memo, you can read memos in the menu!". It has fights where you have to perform moves in a time limit without really clear instruction (I still don't know how some of them work) and, worst of all, you hardly get to actually DO anything...

Whether it's the hint conversations, excruciatingly long unspeedable cutscenes or terrible scripting you lurch from one section to another feeling like you're trapped in a choose your own adventure book, hours of reading interspersed with a few minutes of picking a page.

At one point the start of a video explained how there were two undesirable members of an opposing clan in your friendly Yakuza's club. You knew, with total and utter certainty, you'd be going there to beat them up, but it then took another 10+ minutes of clunky, slow paced cutscene filled with the bleeding obvious and the unnecessary before you could make your way to the club (With lots more cutscenes to look forward to when you get there.

When you're mentally shouting "shut up, just SHUT UP" then it's the sign of a bad date.

In the time it took this cutscene to run he could smoke 42 cigarettes.

The Date With The Demands - Gran Turismo (all of them)

Nobody is ever going to suggest Gran Turismo is a bad game, in fact in dating terms it usually succeeds in being love at first sight thanks to some of the best crafted intro sequences of any games... but it's a date that also wants lobster, champagne and a Mercedes before the second date...

To get anywhere in Gran Tursimo you have to get a specific licence, and receiving them is, at a conservative estimate, 912 times harder than the game itself with a series of arbitrary rules that aren't used anywhere else in the entire series. Logical racing rules but... if I don't need them for the actual game, why do I need them for the tutorial?

To sum it up, allow me to dictate the standard GT player's thought process when doing the licence tests.

"ARG, dammit, no, no, no, NO! You *$%^ing, )!*£ing, cheating %!"£! Why can you bump into me and knock me off the road but if I touch you I'm disqualiARG! $%%£^"!!! But he braked in front of me, not again! GET AWAY FROM ME... ok, where's the missiles?"

Get used to it...

The Date That Left You Waiting - Assassins Creed III

This pains me to write, because I love Assassins Creed (there's more on the series later), but AC:III has the worst start to a game I've ever played. Ever. It's so bad I may never replay the game because the thought of fighting through it fills me with dread, weariness and near kicked-puppy levels of sadness.

The game, as all previous ones had done, marketed itself with it's main character, you saw Connor leaping over rocks, sliding under tree roots, arrowing deer and hatcheting cougars. The sudden switch from the cool, calm and conniving Ezio felt exciting and interesting, the feeling you'd see an assassin of a totally different kind.

So, when the game started and you were a middle aged English white man, it felt a bit weird but, ya know, lets roll with it. So you did, and you rolled, and you rolled and you rolled... until you were the video gaming equivalent of Sisyphus' Rock on a sofa.

Mission after mission passed while playing as the totally unknown and unadvertised Haytham Kenway until finally I think I yelled out loud "when do I get to be the tomahawk guy?!". At that point I was doing everything just because the game told me, with no interest, no emotional buy-in and by then next to no actual will to do it.

Finally, the world's longest tutorial mission finished, you checked your stats and whoa.... apparently you'd completed 3 of the 12 sequences already, a quarter of the game's missions gone by and you had no connection at all to the game's "main" character, the plotline or even the game itself.

But hey, never fear. Now you'd battled wearily through somebody's fevered idea of how a game should start you did at least now get to PLAY the game, right?

Wrong. It was at that point the game flung Sequence 4 at you, which comprised entirely of tutorial missions for the stuff that only Connor does (collectibles, hunting etc). You'd now played a third of the game's Sequences and all you'd done was played a tutorial. You didn't really care about Haytham or Connor (a feeling that lasted) and you had no real idea of plot...

It was at that point you realised what Assassin's Creed III really was. Ubisoft were sick of us taking them for granted, so were going to show us the dreary, time sapping carelessness we COULD expect if things were done badly, just to make us realise just how good the previous games had been.

I fought my way right through not only AC:III but it's expansions too (even worse) just because I'd bought Season Pass. By the end I felt I truly knew what it must be like to be stuck in a loveless marriage just for the sake of the children... and now AC:III had gone to college, maybe it was time to make it sleep in a different room.

"I don't get it Haytham, why are we still doing the missions?"
"I don't know, Charles. I simply don't know..."

Anyway, that's the worst, now how about those first dates that made you go all fuzzy?

The Date That's Six Dates - Dragon Age: Origins

Ah, that moment when you find someone who doesn't just give you one first date, but lots. Every time you meet them it's something brand new and it's like meeting for the first time all over again.

Dragon Age: Origins was that person, while most games bore you on replay as you speed your way through the now easy and well known tutorial you could start DA:O over and over without getting the same experience twice.

That was because DA:O doesn't just have one intro and tutorial, instead it has six, and even then one differs depending on whether you chose a male or female character. Some games let you create a character but would end up with you playing the same missions, DA:O let you do something altogether different and all of them, without exception, we're immersive and really made you care for your character.

They all laid the foundations for your character that meant even though all the origins arrived at the same point at the end, they were reaching it for very different reasons.

Even though the game that followed did change some aspects depending on your origin you wouldn't want to play it every day, but it still had replay value above and beyond almost anything else.

Take your pick...

The Date You Know Everything - Fallout 3

Like a date with someone you've known your whole life, Fallout 3 took the stance you can never start learning too early.

When you start the game, you're are in the process of being born, picking your sex, age and even looks at the most logical time, the very first minutes of your life...

If that wasn't enough, you don't just jump into adulthood, the tutorial keeps on with its real life theme with learning to move and interact as a baby, taking the first steps into adulthood at 10 by learning to interact with others and fire a BB Gun and finally getting your characters attributes.

Even that final part wasn't as simple as picking points from a list, but instead (as a teenager) you were given an aptitude test of personality based questions (the kind that make up far too many "what *insert item* are you" tests) which then give you skills based on your answers.

This meant when you finally had to run from the Vault into the Nuclear Wasteland you were totally invested in your character, this wasn't some already formed lump of pixellated meat... this was you, and you were going to find your Dad, the first face you ever saw in your "life" and the man who guided you to this point.

Fallout games might have their problems (full disclosure, I rage quit New Vegas after my Companions kept going wrong and running off...) but the one thing they give you in abundance is connection. The world of Fallout becomes so ingrained that if you're anything like me you can't hear 50s music anymore without looking out for mutants...

Fallout games aren't just games, they truly are surrogate and vicarious lives, ones you feel a part of from the first moments.

Knowing what you'll look like at 20 when you've only just been born is a bit freaky... 

The Perfect Date - Assassins Creed II

Unless you've just skipped to the end you'll know Assassins Creed III is my most hated intro of all time. Part of my unhappiness stems from just how exquisitely crafted the intro to AC:II was. I am opening myself up to ridicule here but I think the intro for this game was sheer perfection in all aspects... a brave claim I do understand, so let me explain.

An intro/tutorial needs a few things. It needs to guide you into the game without holding your hand too tight. It has to give you a connection with your character. It has to set down the plotline and, to be an acting luvvie, give you the motivation to play. AC:II does this in spades.

After a short baby sequence we are dragged back away from the main character of the game, Ezio, for a quick run as the secondary protagonist, Desmond. However, unlike AC:III this isn't long and ponderous and is a needed scene setter, you are, after all, playing as Desmond even when you're playing as Ezio...

Thankfully though it is short, just a quick sneak, run, fight and climb before you're back in an Animus and back into the body of Ezio, and here is when the mastery begins.

Exio isn't an already well trained fighter (Mass Effect/DA:O) he's just a cocky, womanising, party boy Italian who's getting into trouble the moment you become him, about to start a streetfight over the honour of a woman (or if he has anything to do with it, dishonour).

From here on out during the tutorial you learn everything you need to know to play the game organically, you learn to fight in the streetfight, you learn to move while running away, you learn to heal by fixing up injuries from the fight, you learn freerunning from chasing your brother...

Rather than feeling like the game is holding your hand and telling you gameplay simplicities it's almost hands off, leaving you doing things because you need to and want to, not just because the game tells you to.

Which brings me on to the greatest factor of AC:II, the motivation. Throughout the first few missions we're introduced to mechanics by the rest of Ezio's family, his two brothers, sister, mother and father. These aren't missions given to us just so we learn how to do something, they're simple, even mundane, life chores like carrying a box, collecting feathers or delivering a letter. In some games this would feel boring, but they're perfectly weighted, never taking too long and never repeating, so you're constantly learning new things and meeting new people. By the end of the missions, you know the game, you know Ezio and you've not just met a family you're part of it.

You've seen Ezio's good and bad side, you've felt his love and dedication to his family, you are intricately tied into him and the life he's so happy in and, in turn, you feel happy in...

Then it happens. Just as you're getting comfortable it all gets ripped away, and you don't just feel for Ezio, it's almost a visceral feeling in yourself as well. You see three of those family you'd connected to hanging from the gallows for something they didn't do, one a child. You're on the run, chased and persecuted, half your family dead, your friends and home lost, your life intrinsically changed.

Yes, it's all just a character on the screen but it has been crafted so well that you are invested, totally.

In just a single sequence of missions (1 of 14 including DLC) they have you, hook line and sinker. It's taken you next to no time at all to go from having no clue who Ezio is... to caring not only about him, but the remainder of his family as well.

Just that one simple series of quests has set the scene for not just one, but three games, and you're never short of motivation in any of them. Every moment comes from that initial setup, where you don't just play the games for the sake of the game, you play it because you care just as much as Ezio about his crusade.

That is why this is the best gaming entrance I've ever played, because for me it's perfect. Nothing is stretched out, nothing feels contrived or left out and it is possibly the most important part of why Ezio Auditore da Firenze is one of the greatest video game characters of all time in my mind.

I didn't liken this to a date at first, instead I'll finish with it. This wasn't a first date, it was the start of a relationship, long term, deeply caring and, even when things later may have had their dodgy moments, the start you could always think back to with a smile on your face and rediscover the passion.

I'm Ezio Auditore da Firenze, and you'll learn to care about me in a shockingly short time.

---

Andy is becoming an expert in first impressions having made a near inexhaustible amount of bad ones in his time. If after reading this you still felt like getting a coffee sometime why not follow him on Twitter or Facebook?

Making Unreal, Real

When I think back to when I started gaming graphics weren't just a non-factor, they weren't really even talked about.

Those old Spectrum 48k graphics were utilitarian at best, just to give you a great example here is the visual majesty of Horace Goes Skiing, starring the eponymous Horace the... well, I have never and probably will never understand what dear Horace is, but he did find himself in an interesting collection of activities...

Obviously those didn't stay for too long and I've had some jaw dropping moments over the years, Gran Turismo's Deep Forest Racetrack with its cliffside track, the first appearance of the T-Rex in the original Tomb Raider and more recently the sunset over the Ocean in GTA V are just a few, something I've been known to just stop and take photos of.

So, why this meandering trip down memory lane? Well, it's because I've just been to Paris in a YouTube video, only despite what your eyes might try to tell you, this entire apartment de Francais was created using the new Unreal 4 Engine, so just bear in mind as you start watching that all of this is wireframes, textures and clever coding... then just forget all of that and delight in the journey.

Now just tell me you wouldn't be happy to just wander around that apartment all day until you needed a nap in this bed?

Obviously a demo is a lot different from a game and it might be a while before we see graphics like that in a real game due not only to size restrictions but also performance as I doubt that would look quite so smooth with an invading zombie apocalypse or gang battle sapping the fps but... just wow.

I think we can say for certain, that in the coming years we're going to see one of two things... stunning looking games that are indistinguishable from reality, or the Matrix.

Oh, and finally... just for comparison here's some rendering done with the very first Unreal Engine, developed in the late 90s and first used in, unsurprisingly, Unreal in 1998.

Which leads me to a final thought, back in 98 that was absolutely astounding, so what will gaming look like in another 17 years?

Free Delivery by Cupid!

While I hate to fall into the trap of Commercially Approved Romance day we are soon to be upon that time that make rose growers and Hallmark shareholders so deliriously happy, Valentine's Day.

So, rather than getting the love of your life the obligatory box of chocolates and bunch of flowers that says "It was the 13th of February and the only place open was the petrol station" why not get them some Geek Tragedy clothing, with FREE standard delivery between now and the 2nd of February?

Redeeming it is easy, just spend £30 or $30 in either of our stores, then when you get to the checkout click to add a coupon on the right hand side and use:

European Shop: ALL4LOVE

http://www.ageektragedy.co.uk/uk/

Rest of the World Shop: LOVE15

http://www.ageektragedy.co.uk/us/

Then see the delivery costs fly away like Cupid on a rush order.

Remember, we ship everywhere so check the delivery pages!

Best wishes,

Andy

PS, if you're going to be alone on International Abuse the Singleton Day, why not buy yourself something instead?

Something Old, Something New....

It's finally here!

Yes, after weeks of slaving over a hot Dreamweaver I am proud to announce the all new and improved Geek Tragedy Version 4.01 is now LIVE!

Hopefully you should already have spotted a few of the newer items, but here's a quick roundup!

• New clean design - No more clutter, no more confusion, just clean, simple and easy navigation so you get to find whatever you desire here.

• Easy location switch - Using one of my quick location switches (on the top left or right hand side) you can now move swiftly and effortlessly between the UK and US versions of our site without ever losing track of where you are. Instead of being sent back to the index, you'll be transported directly to the same page on the other side of the digital world!

• New social connections - You're already reading one as I have resurrected the Geek Tragedy Blog and will be using it to let you know about sales, special offers, news and my own thoughts on anything geeky!

• Added stick droids!

That's not all though, as the upcoming month or two will bring a pouring of new things here on Geek Tragedy!

New Products - Loads more clothing items will be added to the Geek Tragedy Collection giving you an even wider choice of clothing with my designs on!

New Ranges - Baby Geek and Geek Tragedy Accessories are both in the stages of being put together as complementary shops to GT, keeping the tiniest of geeks clothed properly, and giving you a choice of accessories like hats, bags, mousemats and more!

New Designs - Now the site is done I can turn my attention to the 917 designs I have sat in my to do folder!

...and MORE - If that's not all we have lots more plans of things coming your way, including a chance for you to use our designs to make your own items all by yourself in your browser! Stay tuned in the next few weeks!

So, thanks to everyone for visiting Geek Tragedy, and I hope you find exactly what you need!